How to talk to your daughter after a bad day on the field (or the court)!

Aug 11, 2019

{{first_name}}, it's what you've been waiting for! 

This is for my parents! 

๐Ÿ˜‘Have you ever struggled with that conversation... 
๐Ÿ˜‘After a bad day on the field or on the court? 
๐Ÿ˜‘In a tournament? 
๐Ÿ˜‘After a horrible game? 
๐Ÿ˜‘After watching strike out after strike out LOOKING? 
๐Ÿ˜‘After seeing your girl make mistake after mistake? 

We all know that in that car after any of those things, you just want your daughter to GET IT, figure it out, learn from it, and ultimately play to potential you know she is capable of. 

Butttttttt... that conversation can get a little complicated, messy, angry, upsetting, and just down right emotional. 

So, let me help you out! I've got you, {{first_name}}!!! ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘

The next conversation you have with your daughter after one of these scenarios above, this is what you're going to do... โฌ‡๏ธโฌ‡๏ธโฌ‡๏ธ

1. Set boundaries ๐Ÿ™…‍โ™€๏ธ
Boundaries are just a way to keep you and your daughter safe when it comes to your emotions. Both of you should have boundaries (you and your daughter). 

Here is an example:
For me, as an athlete, the car ride home after a bad tournament was roughhhhh! There was fresh emotions for both me and my dad. Which led to lots of tears and hurtful conversations (maybe yelling). 
Boundary to set for athlete: Me, the athlete, would like 3 hours after the tournament before we talk about my performance and the tournament. This allows me to process my actions, my feelings, my thoughts, and let's me work through them on my own before talking to my dad or my mom. 
Boundary to set for parent: The same type of boundary can be set for you, as the parent!

These boundaries are going to create that space for both of you to get your emotions in check, work through what you need to on your own, then come together and talk about when you are both in the right mindset that will be PRODUCTIVE! 

**Boundaries Book HERE

Then, use this...

2. Reflect + Grow ๐ŸŒฑ
I use this exercise with the girls in my program. 

After the not so good day, performance, tournament, game, we are going to REFLECT

Here is how we reflect:
Scenario: Your daughter struck out looking.

1st Step: Ask, "Well, _________, what did you do well in that at bat, even though the outcome wasn't what you wanted?"
2nd Step: Ask, "Okay, what did you not do so well in that at bat?"
3rd Step: Ask, "What did you learn from that, so you can move forward?

Productive. Non-emotional. GROWTH! 

Seriously though, this is going to teach you and your daughter how to reflect, learn, grow, and move forward because the best athletes overcome failure the quickest. 

3. Stay positive + remind them you love them no matter what happens ๐ŸŒˆ 
Of course you do this already, but as athletes, we forget this because we are so wrapped up in the emotion and the moment.

You being their biggest fan, their biggest support, means the world to them (especially to fragile teenage girls). 

I am coaching and teaching these girls in my program how to create their confidence through themselves, but having that outside support from mom, dad, coaches, and teammates, HELPS SO MUCH! 


Okay, time to take action! You've got this. I can't wait to hear about how your daughter is achieving more, feeling more confident, and less afraid of failure because of how you show up (in that car ride on the way home). 


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