Watch and learn from former Bama softball player, Ashley Prange on what it takes to trust yourself.

Here are some of the things that really stuck with me after our conversation:

"My confidence came from the conversations and communication I had with my coaches and teammates."

"My confidence was created because I was the rep Queen." — I love that Ashley shared how get reps in that was fun.

"My purpose is always bigger than myself."

"Surround yourself with people who are going to love you even if you go 0 for 4 or 4 for 4."

I love how real Ashley is. I can’t wait to watch her continue to thrive and make an impact on this game.

You can follow Ashley at…

Follow: @ashley_prange

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Paige

I have mentored and coached 100s and 100s of girl athletes now and it’s safe to say almost none of them had a pre-game mindset routine. Meaning, none of them did anything to prepare for their games mentally. To create confidence before going into their games. 

There is one little thing that will help your athlete have confidence in herself.

That one little thing is watching a Confidence Reel of herself before games. AKA, a video she puts together of herself succeeding multiple times!

This is visualization in the form of video! Visualization is a powerful mental training skill because it triggers the parts of your brain that make you think you really did something that you imagined. Meaning, when you visualize yourself being successful at something, your brain believes it’s real! 

Your athlete doing this one little thing can make such a huge difference in her confidence AND it’s something simple and fun. 

Here are a few responses from girl athletes...

Has your daughter ever made a mistake or failed and all she can think about and see is the replay of that mistake or failure?

She’s been using visualization…. but, for the bad.

It’s okay, she can use visualization for the good and it’s going to help her be the most confident version of herself out there.

When athletes visualize (aka seeing themselves succeed at something), they actually stimulate the same brain regions as they do when they physically perform the same action. So, what that means is, the brain is tricking the body into thinking you physically did whatever you visualized!

When I visualize myself hitting a homerun (and let’s be honest… I haven’t done that since college – 9 years ago ), my body thinks I really did that, so it feels like I can do it. That I am capable of that right now. Today! In this moment!

Visualization can do that for your athlete too. We just need to get her to understand the importance and how to do...

Is your daughter so focused on the results (aka her statistics) that she’s not even playing well anymore? Or even worse, not having fun anymore? 

She might be playing for the wrong reasons. 

I know that I was obsessed with my batting average growing up. I remember bunting or even getting out and thinking about how it was going to lower my batting average. It would make me so upset. I think it’s safe to say, this kind of obsession over the results and stats was not helping me play freely, with confidence, and performing the way I knew how to. It was holding me back from my full potential. I was playing for the wrong reasons. 

Here’s the tricky part. How do you get your daughter to let go of the results (statistics) and play for the joy of the game? 

I’m going to walk you through how to help her see playing from a whole new perspective. 

1 Have your daughter write down her goals for playing, competing, and being an athlete

Oftentimes,...

If you guys haven’t seen, I’ve been interviewing former and current athletes and coaches on my Instagram live and it’s been amazing! One of the things I am determined to do is provide you with insight and experience from people who have been through what your daughter is going through. One of the recent guests, Head Field Hockey Coach at Liberty University, Nikki Parsley-Blocker, said, “Confidence is a choice, not a feeling.” That has really stuck with me since hearing it.

Way too often, we determine how we are going to play or perform based on if we “feel” confident or not. But, that’s all backwards because confidence is a choice. We have to choose to be confident.

So many girls that I work with struggle with negative self-talk. Things like…

“I’m not good enough.”

“I’m afraid to fail and let everyone down.”

“I don’t want to play like I did last weekend.”

“My swing...

Feeling nervous before a tournament, a game, tryouts, or even a big test is TOTALLY normal. I think that there is a misconception that nerves are a bad thing. But, they are only a bad thing if you let them affect you negatively. 

I believe that nerves are a privilege. Nerves just mean you are excited to go out and do what you’ve worked so hard on week after week after week. 

So, how do you help your athlete reframe her nervous approach to confidence? I’ve got you. 

Your daughter might…

be thinking about all the negative possibilities.

be worried about what other people might think of her if she fails.

look defeated before she even begins. 

I help the athletes I work with reframe their thoughts. Those nervous, worried, negative, doubtful thoughts. Like this…

What if I do terribly? What if I trust my preparation and just let myself do my thing? 

If I make a mistake, my coach is going to pull me. I deserve this opportunity and I...

Watch and learn from former collegiate field hockey coach and former athlete, Nikki Parsley-Blocker on what it takes to be a part of a championship-caliber team.

Here are some of the things that really stuck with me after our conversation:

We are playing for a purpose not just a goal. This will take the pressure off.

Confidence is a choice. "I have done x, y, z to put myself in a position to succeed."

“One of our pillars is vulnerability. If you see something ask about it, even when you have a ton of things on your to-do list for practice.”

“You can't control the outcome, you can influence it.”

“Identity isn't what you do. You play softball, you're identity isn't a softball player.”

“The big setbacks that happen will eventually be little blips in your timeline that lead to something even greater.”

I can’t wait to watch how God works through Nikki and her incredible team at @libertyuniversity

You can follow Nikki at…

Do you have an athlete that just beats herself up after a game? Super hard on herself? Always negative and points out the bad things that she did?

That post game talk in the car ride home is a critical piece to her confidence. It can go way south and tank her confidence for the next tournament. Or it can be a learning experience and build her confidence for the next tournament.

I’m thinking you are more into the learning and growth in confidence option.

So, let’s talk post game talk.

First, decide with your daughter if the car ride home is a good time to reflect on the game or if she wants to wait till she’s decompressed some more. If you think about your own experiences with long, hard, busy, challenging days, you’d probably agree that having some time to decompress before sorting through it is what you’d choose too. Time and place to have these conversations and sort through her thoughts is crucial.

Second, ask her for permission. I know....

Watch and learn from current UW softball player, Rylee Holtorf on what it takes to make it to the WCWS.

Here are some of the things that really stuck with me after our conversation:

"My confidence comes from knowing I outworked the opponent."

"Pleasure over pressure - I get to have this experience."

"You have to put your faith in a constant - Jesus."

"Keep it fun!"

“Identity isn't what you do. You play softball, you're identity isn't a softball player.”

"No matter where you go to play. you are in control of your reactions and responses and your attitude about it."

I can’t wait to watch Rylee continue to thrive and make an impact on this game.

You can follow Rylee at…

Follow: @ryleeholtorf

Loved this interview? Share it with another mom or dad or athlete that would love it too!

Telling your daughter, “Just believe in yourself,” isn’t cutting it. It’s not helping her actually believe in herself. Deep down, she is still doubting herself and you can see it all over her and you’re praying she can do it, but afraid she won’t execute and then continue to beat herself up on the way home.

Sound way too familiar?

When I played softball, I got a lot of “Just believe in yourself”s. “Go out there and be confident.” From my mom, my dad, my coaches. But, nobody was telling me HOW to believe in myself. HOW to be confident.

So, here’s the how!

Grab my Game Ready Confidence for her. This is a pre-game mindset routine that will help her be mentally prepared and confident going into her next game or tournament.

She will learn the importance of preparing her mind, creating what she wants to happen, and then visualizing her success!

These are simple, yet highly effective tools to help your daughter believe in...