Ever wonder how to step into your confidence?
1 Move past your mistakes
2Stop being so hard on yourself
3Be a leader without being bossy
Keep on keepin’ on,
How to help your daughter step into her confidence!
Have you ever thought about how your choice of words affect your athlete? The phrases you use to cheer her on? What you say to her after a game?
Have you ever said any of these things (you're not in trouble haha)?
Stop dropping your shoulder!
Don't lose her!
Why would you go for that ball?
Your stats are on fire!
You are so talented!
Even though these seem like pretty harmless phrases, there are more positive, empowering, confident ways to say these kinds of things.
They might sound like this...
Keep your shoulder up and stay tall!
Go right after her!
What are some wins and challenges from the game today?
Your effort and your attitude was on fire!
Your hard work is paying off!
The words, thoughts, and things we tell ourselves are so important because...
What we say and think is what we believe!
So, we want to say, share, and think what we want to happen in games and practices rather than the opposite.
It's a really simple...
When my dad is yelling at me for making a mistake after the game, but I already know and beat myself up over it.
I know you know what this feels like haha! It's all fun and jokes when it's not happening, but when you're in the car feeling like total crap, it totally sucks. It creates a wedge between you and your dad/mom. You're all mad, frustrated, upset, crying, all the things.
There is a solution to this!
It's called boundaries and communicating them with your parent!
Boundaries are set to create space for you to work through your thoughts, learn, and then have an even more productive conversation when BOTH of you are in a better headspace to chat about the game.
You HAVE to set these boundaries, meaning you have to share the boundary with your parent.
It looks like this…
Dad, I appreciate you so much and all the time you put into me playing softball.
After the games, I'm like a crazy person and really need to work through some of my thoughts and emotions before we talk...
Answer: You are letting your old beliefs trick you.
First off, it's not your fault. We all have old beliefs that try to hold us back from our full potential.
Bad News: You are going to have negative thoughts, negative beliefs, doubts, fear, worries, all that bologna.
Good News: You can overcome them!
1 The next time you have an old belief, negative thought, doubt, fear, or worry... I want you to get CURIOUS!
Belief: I'll never be a forward on my soccer team.
CURIOSITY: Why do I think that? Where is that coming from? When did I start believing this?
2 Journal and answer those curious questions to work through those old beliefs.
Example: Because the other girl playing forward is really good. Because I've been playing midfielder for so long and my coach has never put me in at forward. I don't even know, but I keep thinking it.
Insight here: If that girl can do it, so can you, but it starts with your beliefs (next step). Maybe you haven't even had a conversation with your...
If you want to start choosing different and confident thoughts, you have to practice!
1Brainstorm positive statements about yourself - be super nice!
Examples: I am strong!, I can do hard things!, I will always bet on me., I am valuable!
2Write them down!
3 Put them somewhere you'll see!
4Say them out loud over and over again!
It's that easy!
Respond with a if you are going to take action and use affirmations to build confidence!
Keep on keepin’ on,
I know you are playing up an age group. Playing with the better competition. Pushing yourself to be better.
I also know that surrounding yourself with older and more experienced athletes can be a confidence killer if you're...
not playing as much as you want
keep comparing yourself to your teammates
keep comparing yourself to the athletes on the other teams you play
constantly feeling like you're never going to be good enough
I want you to remember this... your journey as an athlete is long, like a marathon. If you are putting yourself on teams that are out of your comfort zone, it will pay off in the long run.
It is going to feel challenging. It is going to feel sucky. It is going to feel hard.
Keep learning from your challenges.
Keep learning from the suckiness.
Keep learning from the hard times.
You will be so proud and amazed with yourself when you are passing up other girls because you stuck to it. You fought for it!
Focus on being grateful for the challenges, the suckiness,...
Warming up body:
Pre-game warm ups with your team = normal
Stretching = normal
Warming up mind:
Mindset warm up = not normal
Confidence warm up = not normal
Pre-game visualization = not normal
Journaling before game = not normal
We have to start making warming up our mind NORMAL!
Having a pre-game routine, not just warming up with your team, is going to be a game-changer with your confidence.
AND -- it's EAASYYYYYY!
Here are some things you can do to add to your pre-game routine to feel confident, excited, motivated, and ready to freakin' GOOOOO!
Visualize what you want to happen in your game
Write down powerful affirmations
Watch a highlight video or videos of you crushing it (save to album)
Listen to music
Write down what you are grateful for (good and challenges)
What is your favorite thing to do for pre-game routine? Reply here!
Keep on keepin' on!
Reasons you aren't confident…
Your pre-game warm up with your team determines how confident you'll be in the game
The first 5-10 minutes of your game determines your confidence the rest of the day
The way you played or practiced this week determines how confident you play in your next game
Results, results, results.
You're constantly focused and zoned in on what the results are saying instead of…
CREATING YOUR CONFIDENCE!
Your confidence comes from within you. It isn't determined by your results.
This is the entire mission of The Confident Athlete program.
To take control of creating your confidence.
So many times we tell ourselves and hear from our coaches, "Just be confident."
Well... nobody is showing you HOW. That's where The Confident Athlete program comes in.
We are learning...
How to grow and work on the mental game
How to be more mindful of your thoughts and actions
How to use tools to tap into your confidence when you need it the most
We've all been there…
Maybe you finally downloaded one of my freebies and you're going to start working on your mental game.
Maybe you were going to write down some goals to work on the mental game.
Maybe you don't even know where to start…
And instead... you start scrolling the gram for hours (playing video games anything but being productive).
Then, just like this silly reel...
You don't feel confident.
Went 0-3 in your game (bad performance).
Lost your D1 scholarship.
Your parents are disappointed in you.
You're still not confident.
Everyone keeps telling you to work on your mental game, but do you know how to work on your mental game?
Replay with a for yes OR a for no
Keep on keepin’ on,
I know I talk about thoughts and words and self talk a lot, but I’m SO serious!
Your words are so incredibly powerful.
They can be the difference in you being confident or stuck in the self-sabotage cycle for wayyyyy too long.
I can C L E A R L Y remember in my first 3 years playing college softball for Northwestern, I was telling myself such crap (not the smiling emoji kind).
I remember going into my at-bats telling myself things like…
I can’t get a hit off this girl
If I don’t get a hit, I’ll get pulled out of the lineup
If I don’t get a hit, my batting average will drop
If I don’t get a hit, I’ll disappoint my parents
Literally setting myself up for failure. I was defeated before I even stepped in that box. I didn’t even give myself a real shot.
I can also C L E A R L Y remember when I started telling myself powerful words instead.
Hitting is easy
I can hit anything this girl throws me