Is this your daughter?
She's half in, half out.
Which only leads to average or below average outcomes... which sucks for her and for you, right?!
You can't figure out why she cant just trust herself!
Well, this is why...
Her thoughts and her self talk just don't add up to "confidence."
She's probably thinking...
What if I strike out?
What if I let my team down?
She's probably saying...
I'm never going to be as good as Sally Sue.
I"m not even that great.
She's probably hearing...
Don't swing at that.
You can't do it like that.
Don't do it like this.
What we think and say is what we BELIEVE!
Here is a simple way to practice thinking and saying positive, encouraging, empowering, confident things so your daughter can start BELIEVING!
Have her brain dump "I am ____________" statements. You can even do this with her. Brain dump your own "I am ___________"...
Is your daughter...
nervous in pressure situations?
hard on herself after a tough game?
stressed out trying to juggle all the school and sports?
I get it. Your daughter doesn't want to listen to you, but just in case she is listening, here are some things to help her be more confident.
1 What she can control = effort, attitude, mindset
PRAISE THE HECK OUT OF THIS!!!!
Remind her how important her self talk is
Use your own personal examples that you have experienced as an adult to relate to her
2 What she CAN'T control = the results and the outcomes
Remind her that the outcomes and the results are out of our control
Talk about how she can adjust the process and her strategy to direct new results
Let her tell you the new plan and what she can do to create change!
3 Her growth mindset
It's a process.
Forget the comparison.
She is enough.
How can she grow and learn?!
You know when you mess up. So do we as daughters. Let's focus on...
I have a lot of girls (and adults) ask me how do I balance it all?
How do you go from practice to lesson to game to practice and STILL get really good grades?
How do you get your homework done and be a top notch athlete?
How do you do it all without feeling so stressed out?
You're probably thinking, duh, I knew that. BUT, it's hard to figure out how to do all those things and do them well. I'm here to help you with that HOW!
My #1 secret to being a successful student, athlete, friend, and family member is...
Yep! 1 tool took me from grade school all the way till today. It's like my 2nd Bible.
How do you use that thing to your advantage though? Let's relieve that stress you're feeling!
1. Know the end goal.
Homecoming (School Dance)
2. Know the actions and steps to get to the end goal.
Example: For a test...
These are EASY ways to add mental training to gain confidence into your life as a student-athlete!
There is so much going on in our crazy athlete lives.
For all of us - parents, coaches, and athletes!
First of all, you bring your brain with you everywhere you go... not your equipment, right?! So, this should be super easy!
I'm going to make this as simple as I can for you because when you work on your mind, everything clicks and you become the confident athlete you want to be!
You start playing to your full potential
You have SO much fun doing it!
You start conquering your goals
You feel CONFIDENT!
Here are the 3 things!
1. Visualize before you perform
Visualize in the double hole (softball peeps)
Visualize before the game even starts
Visualize on the bench waiting for your opportunity
When you visualize for even 30 seconds and see...
I feel ya. I was this girl. Bomb practice player up in here!
No pressure, no problem!
But what is the point of putting in all that hard work and falling short when it matters?!
We play to win.
We play to succeed.
We play to be the best.
So, let's get you feeling confident and crushing it on the field!
Here's your new mental game plan!
4 seconds in through your nose...
HOLD it at the top...
4 seconds out through your nose...
HOLD at the bottom...
2. Self Talk
Create a mantra and say that over and over!
See this video for more mantra help https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCzcOQUlnQk
See your most confident-highest version of you showing up in that game time situation and see yourself succeeding!
Go here for help practicing visualization with my step-by-step guide...
What do you do?! She has to keep going, right?!
She probably wants to quit because...
Coaches just aren't understanding her
Too much pressure
Can't take the failure any longer
She's just unhappy out there
Her social life is non-existent
This is where the Mental Game comes in...
I know the main focus in sports is the physical component and the skills that need to be practiced, but what we are missing is the foundation, YOUR DAUGHTER'S MINDSET!
What your daughter is saying and thinking is the most important thing because what you say and what you think is WHAT YOU BELIEVE!
So, if she's hearing her coach only criticize her results and never encourage her efforts, she's probably saying and thinking...
I'll never be good at this whole hitting outside pitches thing
Why do I even try anymore
I should just quit
This is too hard
Or maybe she's doing it to herself - her own worst critic!
Either way... the...
She is a consistent, confident, powerhouse hitter on her softball team! AND she believes those things too!
Wouldn't it be awesome to say those things about yourself?!
You'll hear Adri talk about...
How she felt before she starting ACTUALLY working on her mental game and how she really, really wanted to feel confident and happy on the field, but couldn't quite figure it out.
What she practices consistently day in and day out to be the hitter that she has become (amazing, consistent, powerful, confident, clutch)!
How she helps her teammates around her if they are struggling with their confidence or can't get past a bad slump.
The way she gets past mistakes, strike outs, slumps, all the bad things!!
What she thinks makes her a great, reliable hitter in the lineup.
Her dream college!
I am so incredibly proud of what Adriana has...
ME!!! X 100 it feels like.
Slumps and ruts are the WORST!!
They make you want to...
crawl in a hole and never come out
You'd do anything to get out of that slump and just make it stop!
Fix your mechanics
Here's the secret...
Visualization + Positive Self Talk
You've heard me talk about this before, maybe a few times, it's because I'm dead serious!
Visualization and Positive Self Talk creates...
In The Mental Game Mentorship, my girl athletes are visualizing and practicing positive self talk EVERY DAY! It's part of their accountability in the mentorship program. When you practice these mental game skills, your game will LEVEL UP and you will get out of these slumps and ruts!
Here it is!
DO NOT BE AFRAID TO...
ask for help
ask for advice
What better way to learn than from other people's experiences? They've already done the ground work.
This is how it looked and looks for me (PROOF)!
Middle School / High School
I didn't do this nearly enough in middle school and high school.
I did ask my mom for help (usually in a panic because something was due SOON).
You SHOULD ask all the questions about college! What is it like? What does it take? What are the challenges? What did you like? What major did you pursue? Did you like that major? Would you do anything differently?
You SHOULD ask all the questions about being a student-athlete! How did you balance all of it? What did you do when you had to travel? What did you learn from your experience?
You SHOULD ask about jobs and careers you are interested in! What do you love about this position? What do you not like? How did you get here? What...
I get it.
Your mom or dad is...
always on you
wondering why you'd strike out
hard on you when you don't do well
hard on you when you did do well
It drives you crazy. It drove ME crazy!
It makes you want to quit.
It causes way too many tears.
You wonder what life would be like if you weren't an athlete.
I PROMISE you it is all out of love. I SWEAR they mean well, but they just don't always do a perfect job communicating it (no one's perfect, right?!).
So, here's the deal.
They love you so much, they just want to see you succeed (maybe sometimes more than you).
They see the potential in you that you might not even see in yourself.
They only want the best for you because you are the best!
‼Game Plan‼ (because they are still driving you nuts):
Be the bigger daughter and surprise them
Give them some grace, just like you'd want in return
Set boundaries and communicate effectively
Coach them up!
Hugs, lots of hugs
Enjoy your time...